Un Tir À La Corde

Je m’implique dans un tir à la corde sans cesse. Bien qu’il se favorise davantage au côté de mes opposants, et bien que je sois destiné à me perdre à la fin, j’essaie quand même de me lever des désespoirs et des déconvenues, en marchant difficilement à l’avant.

Est-il utile de se planifier? J’en doute, à cause du fait que trop de choses dans la vie, qui se passent à base de ses propres calendriers. Je me suis rendu très déçus au passé par des plans, qui se sont déroulés contre ma volontaire et mes préférences. L’imprévisibilité du futur me fait penser que, peut-être, je dois me laisser tomber la prise sur la vie, en la laissant se progresser naturellement. C’est ainsi que je ne me souffrirai pas profondément à l’intérieur de mon âme.

Je suis soldat, qui fait face au monde tout seul. Les guerres de toutes sortes que j’ai vécues m’ont fait grandir et cicatriser. Je ne suis pas encore fou, et un peu d’espoir me reste encore. Univers, soyez avec moi pour toujours.

Men & Long Johns

It is still cold in Toronto today. Having just walked from St. Lawrence Market to YMCA located Yonge and Grosvenor, my nostrils are filled with sticky liquid that can easily make me suffocate from the lack of supply of oxygen.

Last night on BBC Radio London, there was an interesting discussion about men wearing long johns. According to the radio host, the reason why many men do not like to layer up sartorially during the cold winter months is because they do not like to be considered as wussy.

Really? We are now in 2016! If you are a man, who still subscribes to this archaic way of thinking, then you deserve to be considered as wussy.

The layers and layers of clothes that one wears on a minus ten day do not diminish his masculinity. The amount of sun screen that one puts on his face before he steps out into the sun does not make him less of a man. To the contrary, the self-care that he has given himself demonstrates to others that he is secure of who he is, as well as that he is a responsible adult. Masculinity will never be smartly asserted by wearing just one layer of clothing on a bone-chilling winter’s day. In fact, trying to appear tough and manly on the outside can make a man come across as idiotic and self-centered.

Always prioritize the need to be safe and warm over any inclination to be tough and sexy during the winter months.

My Thought For Today

I woke up this morning and told myself to believe that everything would work out in my favor. It was a blind faith that I felt the need to hold on to. It was a leap of faith that I needed to take.

I have done many things out of blind faith in my life. Some worked out perfectly, while others had not. Quite often, what leads me to embark on an adventure is my curiosity in the unknown and the foreign. And quite often, what helps me push through the depressing darkness of the inevitable failures is also my curiosity in wanting to find out what the unknown future has in store for me.

We are told to plan for our future. It seems like thorough planning can, somehow, eliminate the number of uncertainties that await us down the road. Unfortunately, the mighty brain of human being has yet to be advanced enough to sketch out a blueprint that will pardon the planner a future of unforeseen setback and destined challenges.

I sit in deafening quietness to contemplate. I contemplate on my life and all its relationships, which are intricately crisscrossed and woven into a life’s tapestry. I am puzzled at the variant degree of each and every relationship, and I am confused at the divergence of each every relationship’s authenticity, genuineness, and intentionality.

Best thinking is done in a quiet place. In a quiet place, I think to realize how far I am away from people, with whom I have a relationship. It seems like no one that I have interacted with so far understands me truly. My silence may have deny them the opportunity to get to the depth of my heart. My dullness may have dimmed the spark in their curious eyes. Maybe…and just may be, I am not meant to be understood by others but me.